Consciousness - we hear this word so often that it is very likely to miss it, just like a song on the background radio. But the meaning and depth pass us by. Consciousness is a great and transformative value to introduce into one's life. And things are changing. But consciousness is not just a changing condition of our personal lives. When being conscious of a relationship, we see different qualities in it. We are open to things as they are without making an illusory story of our relationship.

Being conscious in a relationship means seeing the real situation, the real things to work with, and the things to change to a new quality. Look bravely at the moment here and now and don't turn away. And what cannot and should not be changed is to be accepted and allowed to be. We tend to want the other to change, although he is not experienced and does not know such a concept. We want her to begin cooking dinner, although she can not stand to operate in the kitchen. We are waiting and fantasizing.

But is it worth it?

Isn't it more sensible not to accentuate what we want to change but to recover wasted energy so that we can invest it in wonderful dates, being together, and our creative work projects or hobbies? Appreciate the good qualities of a loved one in a relationship as a gift. Are we being together and hearing the person, not the fantasy?

In a relationship where we talk little about our feelings and do not listen to each other deeply, we are waiting and arguing not with our loved one but with the image we have fantasized about, giving them both bad and good qualities. And we also delegated all the responsibility to them. Why not try the other way around - if you want your loved one to change something, but they don't do it, why not start with yourself and change your pattern of behaviour and attitude?

Although never say never, it will never be the case that only one person has imperfections (and oh, imperfections are the beauty we love in true love, not find defective). Another one’s pattern of failure or behavior can provoke us to reveal aspects of ourselves to work with. Do I get angry fast? Do I play the victim? I take but do not give? When we are conscious in a relationship, we notice these things, and that is wonderful. We can thank ourselves, the loved one, and the situation that our incompletes have been highlighted and we can finally roll up our sleeves and start working with them.

Interesting facts about consciousness

• The practice of consciousness can be considered a form of meditation; although based on more than 2,500 years of Buddhist meditation tradition, consciousness is also a rationally grounded mind training;
• Consciousness skills need to be trained and implemented in daily life just like daily exercise, no practitioner will be left without results;
• Many scientific studies have shown that the practice of consciousness makes a noticeable contribution to both emotional and physical health, thus allowing you to experience your daily, creative, and career fulfilment, relationships with your loved ones and other people at a completely different level of quality;
• Consciousness practice includes knowledge, meditation, and exercises for clarity of mind and integrity of the body.

Author: Ieva Krastina

Photo: RACHEL TAKES PICTURES